TheOpenBottle wrote:I drink because the greatest attributes of mankind are hidden deep within his plush underbelly. Filling him with booze causes the attributes to grow, & spill-fourth into the world. Drinking makes you a god among men.
Barca wrote:Someone recently pointed out to me what a horrible year 2004 was for them, the year of teh suck, as the intertron kids say. Then I remembered hearing the same thing about 2003 and 2002, and, of course, for most Americans 2001 was certainly a horrible year.
I realized that as you get older life seems to be filled with a great deal more misfortune than good news. There are more funerals than births, more divorces than weddings, more layoffs than promotions. In addition, while one builds towards a good event with weeks, months, or even years of planning, diligence and hard work, misery strikes suddenly and unexpectedly. So the good news builds incrementally while tragedy comes in unpredictable large doses.
Every day thousands of planes take off and land without incident, millions of school children arrive home from school safely and unaccosted, thousands of soldiers build schools, bridges and aqueducts, but seemingly every day one incident or another somewhere in the world wipes all of this happiness and success from our consciousness, replacing it with terror, death, and destruction.
Quickly, our world and our lives seem tortured and hopeless, an inexorable parade of misery and misfortune. Birthdays are no longer celebrations, but memoriams for surving the past 364 days. Weekends are simply pit stops in a macabre race to death.
For me, alcohol changes all that. Take a tipple, or twelve, and joy becomes the rule not the exception. Let loose libations on your life and opportunities seem more glorious than their potential pitfalls. Terror is replaced by fantasy, and the illusions of impending doom are exposed as the infantile incubi they are.
The world is a glorious place resplendent with miracles just waiting to fill us all with awe and wonder. Alcohol, in all its divine incarnations, waits to be our guide, to dispel the fears inflicted upon us by the unrighteous and the doubts erected by our own insecurities, and shepherd us to the achievement of all our potential. Alcohol, with a kind word here and a firm hand here, banishes the fictional shadows we use to constrain ourselves and opens up the gates to a temporal nirvana where all things are possible and everything is a joy.
I take a couple whiskeys and become a raconteur evocative of Clemens. Down a vodka or three and Nijinsky envies me. Pass that pot of rum my way and Sinatra would seduce with my serenades. Apply alcohol effectively and consistently and soon those moments of undrunkenness are mere periods of transition before returning to your real life of excellence and enjoyment.
That's why I drink.
Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest