The Bender Defined

[Modern Drunkard]

Damn straight. Benders define the drunkard. To use a military analogy, it's the difference between a soldier and soldier who's seen combat. Getting drunk is field exercises, a proper bender is going to war.

[theotherone7]

If a bender is under one week in length you should ignore most personal hygene. Change clothes only if the ones you're wearing become "soiled."

Hell if it's under a week it might not even be a bender. It could just be "a long week-end"

If you didn't fall at least once or aquire a Mysterious Alcohol Related Injury you may not call it a bender. It would then mearly be considered a tilt.

Large chuncks of time will be blurry and missing. No Blackout- no bender.

A bender is best done solo. This is no time for friends and family. You're on a mission of self discovery here. It's time to test your limits.

It's also no time to experiment always order "the usual." It's a repetetive motion, a conveyor belt, factory work. Boom! schuckschuck Boom! schuckschuck Boom! ad infenitium.

Employment is the natural enemy of a bender. If you want a real one spend those vaciotion days and say "Fuck Hawaii!" It's time to deplete the war chest.

A bender is a test of your mettle. There is a hierarchy of drinking and the bender stands alone at the top.

Very well put. I wish I could get around the employment thing

[greygoose]

If a bender is under one week in length you should ignore most personal hygene. Change clothes only if the ones you're wearing become "soiled."

I now have a mantra for the Con, like I needed it.

[wakeless]

Also, around here we consider 5 days on it to be called a "test match", you know like a game of cricket.

[frankennietzsche]

I like "test match".

I had a thought: Perhaps we should start defining some of the other terms for periods of drinking, either long or short, heavy or light. Anywhere from "long weekend" to "career drunk". I think that it should probably be a seperate thread; whether it should be stickied or not is up to someone else.

A few example terms: binge, brannigan, carousal, carouse, drunk, spree, toot, jag, tear, bat, etc (I got these from various online thesauri.)

[WastelessPointOfTime]

If a bender is under one week in length you should ignore most personal hygene. Change clothes only if the ones you're wearing become "soiled."

Hell if it's under a week it might not even be a bender. It could just be "a long week-end"

If you didn't fall at least once or aquire a Mysterious Alcohol Related Injury you may not call it a bender. It would then mearly be considered a tilt.

Large chuncks of time will be blurry and missing. No Blackout- no bender.

A bender is best done solo. This is no time for friends and family. You're on a mission of self discovery here. It's time to test your limits.

It's also no time to experiment always order "the usual." It's a repetetive motion, a conveyor belt, factory work. Boom! schuckschuck Boom! schuckschuck Boom! ad infenitium.

Employment is the natural enemy of a bender. If you want a real one spend those vaciotion days and say "Fuck Hawaii!" It's time to deplete the war chest.

A bender is a test of your mettle. There is a hierarchy of drinking and the bender stands alone at the top.

Very well put. I wish I could get around the employment thing

Benders used to be the only reason I took vacation time.

[Grace O'Malley]

So, I have a week off, sort of. Starting next Saturday, 8/1/09. I need to be in somewhat working order to make a trip from Portland, OR to Seattle, WA on 8/6/09, without any tickets or collisions. I do intend on laying in a quantity of vodka, which I do like.
Any suggestions, y'all?

[Bob Young]

I haven't been on a bender since I got my job back. Tear. But when I lost my job and had a little extra cash that was the best 4 months of my life. Id drink from the moment I woke up till the moment Id fall out. The name of the game was "cheep rum", by the end of it all I had a kitchen counter drawer full of the caps from the handles I drank. I was gonna save the handles them-self's but room was beginning to become an issue. Nearly every piece of my cheep furniture in my crappy apartment was broken. Good times, and fuzzy memories (fuzzy = non-existent).

[ghostface1]

i've never enjoyed a bender. but i do think too many people like the idea of it, but should like and experience what is considered a 'lost weekend'.

i agree 100% that a bender has no specific date or time limit other than must be over a week, and i think this keeps us righteous.

HOWEVER

this is not a criticism or argument, merely a sad state of affairs: i fucking hate work. to anyone with the funds to enjoy a lifestyle racking up dough and consummating a life-long bender-ish love affair with the aqua vitae, i salute you. have a good-ish amount for me, will you?

[Bob Young]

I agree, work sucks. Heres to the man that can drink all day without a worry in the world.

[royhobbs30]

I will have to admit that this may be one of my longer "benders" but not the longest one. To date I'm going on day number 15 or so, and work? Good lord, can it take a break for at least 4 days so i can continue on my bender?

I may take a break this weekend, but I highly doubt it, when you get to reach that subtle , sublime place when you're on that bender that I like to call Eden, why come off of it?? enjoy the endless bender ladies and gents..

[royhobbs30]

The 18 day bender is over. Weird morning, kindy shaky, a little irritated, a little quiet at work...what a day to take a break, freakn' monday...

[JesusLizard23]

The 18 day bender is over. Weird morning, kindy shaky, a little irritated, a little quiet at work...what a day to take a break, freakn' monday...

I am always quiet at work.

[hoverdog]

Just reminding people keep in mind during a bender you must start drinking the moment you wake up and you must black out.

[Ozz]

Wake up and start drinking till passing out every day

1 day, - a binge,
2 days in a row - a bowout,
3 days in a row - a drunk
4 days in a row-, a rip
5 days in a row- a revel
6 days in a row , a tear
7 days in a row or more, a bender